Otherwise Engaged

My friend and fellow 90-devotee, Kate, got engaged to my friend Isaac. It's very exciting to see two friends happy and planning their future, sure, but selfishly, of course, my first comment, when Kate shared the good news and asked me to be a bridesmaid was not, "Yes, thank you!" No. It was, "Can I wear Kelly Taylor's dress from Jackie's wedding?" Luckily, Kate got the joke, and Isaac googled the image while we spoke on the phone, and then she laughed.

Coincidentally, Andrea and Jesse just got hitched in reruns this week, which brings up an interesting and somewhat depressing fact. 90210 weddings and engagements are pretty much doomed. I mean, what couple's wedding/engagement can be emulated? Donna and David were ruined in the new show, which is totally enraging.

Think about it.

Marriages:
Jackie and Mel - Knocked up bride, infidelity, break ups
Andrea and Jesse - Knocked up, cheating, divorced?
Steve and Janet - Knocked up (but maybe the happiest couple??)
Dylan and Toni - Bride shot by hit man the day after the wedding, disowned by father for marrying Dylan
Abby and Carl - Annulled the day after, sleeps with his fiance's daughter (Oh, 90210!)
Donna and David - Apparently, doesn't end well
Nat and Joan - Knocked up (I'm sensing a pattern), and Joan vanishes


Engagements:
Brenda and Stuart - Called it off at the altar
Kelly and Brandon - rejected a proposal sophomore year at CU, then called it off at the altar post-college
Bill Taylor and Abby Malone - Abby was left at the altar
Kelly and Matt - called off
Jack McKay and Christine Pettit - Jack allegedly blew up in a car (later learned to be faked)

Now, there are other characters who get engaged or married and we don't KNOW the spouse, and don't see the wedding, so we don't know how it turns out. But maybe Ray Pruit and Wendy are happy. Maybe Celeste Lundy and Tracy Gaylian were better off dating outside "the gang." Muntz seemed happy dancing with his wife to Brian Setzer Orchestra. But I can't say to Kate, "Pick a wedding dress that looks like Celeste's!!" What was it called when people got married in the New Evolution? A muletting? Terri at the Beverly Beat... Dottie, Jim's hot secretary, Leslie Sumner. I'm sure I could think of more. But I think I've made my point.

I guess Nat and Steve are the model grooms. YIKES!